Introductions and conclusions: advertising aimed at children
You can open a Task 2 essay with the question in your own words and your position, and close it without adding anything new.
At band 7, the Task Response descriptor reads a clear and developed position is presented. The examiner meets your position in your first paragraph, and checks in your last one that it has not changed.
Both paragraphs are short, and you can plan both before you write a word of the body. The question here is about advertising aimed at children.
Warm-up
What is wrong with this ending?
This is the last sentence of an essay that argues for a ban on advertising to children.
Read thisIn conclusion, adverts aimed at children should be banned, and governments should also put a tax on fast food.
What is the problem?
How it works
You should spend about 40 minutes on this task.
Some people think that advertising aimed at children should be banned.
To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Write at least 250 words.
The introduction: two sentences
- 1Sentence 1: the question in your own words
Keep every part of the claim: advertising, aimed at children, banned. Change the words and the order, and leave nothing out.
- 2Sentence 2: your answer and your reasons
Say how far you agree, then name the two reasons your body paragraphs will explain, in a few words each.
Two introductions
Nowadays, advertising is everywhere. Some people think that advertising aimed at children should be banned. I will discuss this in my essay. A general opening, the question copied, and no answer.
Adverts for toys, sweets and online games are often made with children in mind, and some people argue that they should be prohibited. I agree with this view, because... The claim in new words, then a clear position.
The conclusion: short, with nothing new
- 1Signal the end
Use In conclusion or To sum up, once.
- 2Give your position again, in new words
It must match your introduction. An essay that agrees at the start and only partly agrees at the end looks unclear.
- 3Sum up the reasons
One short phrase for each reason, again in new words.
- 4Stop
No new argument, example or question. An idea worth making belongs in a body paragraph.
Watch me do one
The claim is advertising aimed at children should be banned. I mark its three parts: advertising, aimed at children, banned. My first sentence must keep all three.
I find new words for each: adverts, made with children in mind, prohibited. I add what the adverts sell, toys, sweets and online games, so the sentence tells the reader something.
Sentence one: Adverts for toys, sweets and online games are often made with children in mind, and some people argue that they should be prohibited.
Now my answer. I agree, and my plan has two reasons: young children cannot tell when they are being persuaded, and the adverts put pressure on parents.
Sentence two gives both: I agree with this view, because young children cannot easily tell when they are being persuaded, and because these adverts put unfair pressure on parents. After two sentences, the examiner knows my whole answer.
A model answer
Some people think that advertising aimed at children should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
Adverts for toys, sweets and online games are often made with children in mind, and some people argue that they should be prohibited. I agree with this view, because young children cannot easily tell when they are being persuaded, and because these adverts put unfair pressure on parents. The first reason is that young children are an easy audience. An adult knows that an advert is trying to sell something, but a six-year-old often sees it as one more cartoon or video. This is even more likely online, where adverts appear inside games and look much like the content around them. A child who is told that a toy will make them happy usually believes it. When one side cannot see that it is being sold to, the exchange is not a fair one. We already protect children in other areas where they are too young to judge for themselves, such as films and gambling, and advertising should be treated in the same way. The second reason is the effect on families. Adverts are designed to make children want things, and it is parents who then have to say no, sometimes several times a day. This leads to arguments at home, and parents on low incomes may feel that they are letting their children down when they cannot afford what the screen is showing. With adverts for sugary snacks, giving in has a further cost, because it can start eating habits that are difficult to change later in life. In conclusion, I believe that advertising which targets children should not be allowed. Young children are not able to see through it, and it leaves parents to deal with the demands it creates at home.
- VocabularyAdvertising aimed at children, said in new words, with examples of what these adverts sell.
- VocabularyBanned becomes prohibited, and the claim belongs to some people, so it is clearly the question's view.
- TaskThe position, at the start of the second sentence.
- CoherenceThe two reasons, in the order the body paragraphs explain them.
- CoherenceThe first body paragraph opens with the first reason.
- CoherenceThe second body paragraph picks up the second reason.
- TaskThe position from the introduction again, reworded.
- TaskBoth reasons again, shorter and in new words. Nothing new is added.
Coloured text shows what the examiner is looking for.
Make one check before you finish any essay: read your first paragraph and your last paragraph one after the other. They should give the same answer in different words.
Practice with Elita6 questions
Four quick questions, then you paraphrase a new question and write its first and last paragraphs.
The claim in new words
Which sentence would work as the first sentence of the introduction?
Choose the best paraphrase of: Some people think that advertising aimed at children should be banned.
Which sentence is this?
Another writer disagrees with the ban. Where in the essay does this sentence belong?
I disagree with this idea, because a ban would be hard to enforce online and parents are better placed to set limits.
Choose the conclusion
Four possible conclusions for the model essay. Which one does the job?
Choose the best conclusion.
One sentence too many
This conclusion has one sentence that does not belong in it. Choose it.
Which sentence contains the error?
Paraphrase a new claim
Rewrite this claim in your own words, as the first sentence of an introduction. Keep every part of it.
Some people believe that the news media give too much attention to bad news.
Set up your learning path at the top of this lesson to get band-specific feedback.
First and last paragraphs
Write the introduction and the conclusion for the same question. Leave out the body paragraphs.
Some people believe that the news media give too much attention to bad news. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Write the introduction (two sentences) and the conclusion (one or two sentences).
0 / 70 words
Set up your learning path at the top of this lesson to get band-specific feedback.
Words to keep
Made or planned for a particular person or group. Adverts for sweets are often made with children in mind.
Officially say that something must not happen; ban. Some people want to prohibit adverts during children's programmes.
Make someone want to do or believe something. Young children often cannot tell when they are being persuaded.
Make someone feel that they must do something. Adverts for toys put pressure on parents to buy.
Recognise the real purpose behind it. Most adults can see through an advert that pretends to be a video.
Disappoint someone who depends on you. Some parents feel they are letting their children down when they say no.
Before you go
Open with the claim in your own words, and keep every part of it.
End the introduction with your position and two short reasons.
Start the conclusion with In conclusion or To sum up, and give the same position in new words.
Add nothing new at the end: no new argument, example or question.
Next: Next, General Training candidates write a complaint to a film service that took a payment twice. Academic candidates go on to Unit 10, about science, which opens with conditionals.